If there were in-match dialogue...
Comments
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Elektra: Prepare! For the Ballet..... of DEATH!
Everyone else on the other team: Meh, that kind of hurts?
(Deadpool: This is the part where we put in a joke about a dinosaur in a tophat dancing better, right?)0 -
PX: Alright Natasha, let's try this again. Wanda uses an Arcane Incantation to power your Deceptive Tactics. You make 2 or 3 match 5s and then my giant floating head destroys the enemy.
GSBW: Okay.
PX: Alright, go ahead Wanda.
SW: I can't, for some reason I have this compulsion to keep matching my spell tile.
PX: This is infuriating. We don't need blue AP. Go match something else, the other team looks like they are planning something big.
[Later]
SW: There we go, that should be enough purple.
PX: Good work Wanda! (Mumbles: about time...) Now Natasha, let's line up those green tiles.
[Beat]
PX: Wait, what are you doing!
GSBW: I don't know, for some reason I just used all of our purple to randomly drop six green tiles on the board.
SW: Why is this happening!?! We were doing just fine an hour ago!
PX: Perhaps this is mind control by a higher power? But I don't sense anything...
GSBW: Doesn't seem to be a higher power to me.
PX: Oh God, you're right... we are being controlled by either a very weak mind... or a really tinykitty AI.
[All scream]0 -
Hood: [brandishing pistols] Hurry on back, Redwing, and everything will be alright...
Cap: What's your problem? It's just a bird.
Hood: We won't have a problem, as long as you catch that shield faster. Right?
Cap: [muttering] ...he wouldn't be so upset if the bloody bird would grab a tommy gun instead always bringing back hail...0 -
Iron Fist: Watch as my Exquisite Technique takes down another no-good thug - wait, what?
Bullseye: I'm claiming your kill as mine! Ka-ching! Now I'm going to use my purple ap to kill something else!
... where did it go?
PX: Hush. You can't see me now but I've invested your earnings in a Swiss bank, have you seen the interest rates lately?
This interlude brought to you by the Big Enchilada, wherein Bullseye steals all of IF's kills to make 53 strike tiles and invisible PX buffs the whole shebang for 5.8k dmg match3s.
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Captain America: Give me a red.
Cap throws his shield at the enemy.
Iron Man 40: Nice shot Steve!
Captain America: Give me a red.
Iron Man 40: We've got plenty of green, why don't we...
Cap throws his shield again, overwriting his own red countdown tile.
Captain America: GIVE ME A RED.
Iron Man 40: FINE, here you go!
Cap throws his shield.
Iron Man 40: If anyone asks, I'm taking a nap.
Captain America: OUR BOYS, OUR BOYS.
Edited to add: Welcome back to the game, IM40!0 -
This is what kept running through my head during the Matchmaking PvP event for me:
3Pool: "I know you came into this fight at very low health, Phoenix, but don't worry, I'll protect you from any nukes so you won't die!"
Me and Phoenix: "Um, stop doing that!"0 -
4Thor: Stark, if you don't stop with the wisecracks, I'm gonna stick Mjolnir right up your...
IM40: Charging dock? Go for it, Jane. It'll be awesome, I promise. You're gonna lov...
[SYSTEM RESET]
4Thor: OK, if you say so...
[CHARGE COMPLETE]
4Thor: (brandishing Mjolnir, which is now crackling with new-found energy) Whoa.
*** SMITE ***
Everyone still standing: Whoa.0 -
Deadpool: Hey, Logan, it's me, your ol' buddy!!
Wolverine: Look, bub, I'm retired from all this hero schtick now, so go bother someone else. I haven't popped a claw in years.
Deadpool: But, I've got a plan, Logan!
Wolverine: Your last plan involved me manually detonating your stupid bombs by hitting them.
Deadpool: This one's waaaay better!
Wolverine: Somehow, I get the feeling I'm not gonna like this one any more than the first.
Deadpool: I promise, there are no bombs in this one.
Wolverine: Alright, what is it?
Deadpool: You stand out in front of the bad guys, and let them hit you. If they hit you hard enough, I whip out my trusty blades, and hit them back. It's so simple, nothing could possibly go wrong!
Wolverine: Wade, this plan is even worse than the first one. Why let them hit me first?
Deadpool: I've got this spiffy grey suit now, it doesn't hide the blood as well as the red one.
Wolverine: I am not going to stand in front and let people hit me, just so you can hit them back.
Deadpool: Don't be such a geriatric! Do you have a healing factor or not?0 -
morph3us wrote:Deadpool: I've got this spiffy grey suit now, it doesn't hide the blood as well as the red one.
Next 5* should be Brown Suit Deadpool!0 -
Scarlet Witch: Just you wait, with all this channelized arcane power your defeat is inevitable... wait where did it go... AND WHERE DID ALL YOUR HEADS GO?!
Grey Widow packs up her rifle from half a block away and saunters away nonchalantly.0 -
Thug: I really want to threaten you guys, but every time I'm about to speak something keeps taking my voice away...
The Hood: Yeeeeeees, THREATEN BULLETS AWAY!!!!0 -
Muscle: Boss, I really think I need a raise. I really think I'm carrying the load here in this organization...I mean I've been successfully threatening and then gunning down cosmic powered superheroes and Gods and everyone else just kind of stands around. Shouldn't I be up for a promotion?
Don: Shh, quiet, you brute. Don't you see that I'm in the process of stealing their AP eventually? Now shut up and get back to work! We need you to go kill Thor!
Muscle: Uh, ok, boss....
(At the Baxter Building)
Sue: Reed, I'm sorry, but I'm leaving you.
Reed: WHAT?
Sue: I'm sorry Reed, but just feel like you and I just don't work well together a team...I've found someone else.
Reed: Well who is it?
(Quicksilver speeds into the building and stands next to Sue)
Sue: I'm with Pietro now. He's really the only person who makes me feel like I'm actually useful...like I can contribute.
Quicksilver: It's true, I love Sue. I especially love her force bubbles.
Reed: Well, Sue, this is actually a relief. Because I've been meaning to tell you that I've found someone else too. In fact, he's here now. Come on out honey, we don't have to hide our love anymore.
(Carnage enters the room and starts making out with Reed while the other two look on in shock)
Quicksilver: Well, I didn't see that coming.0 -
Falcon:Help me out Redwing my faithful friend, go and sit on that Countdown tile which is about to kill everyone.
(Redwing flies off)
Falcon: No! Not that one, the dangerous one.
(Redwing pretends he cannot hear)
Moments later...
Falcon/allies: aaaarrrgggghhh!
(Redwing feasts on the carcasses of his owner and allies)0 -
Iron Man: JARVIS, let's power up the batteries in this Model 40 suit. Initiate Recharge.
JARVIS: Recharging initialised. Please stand by.
Iron Man: Wait, who's that? Oh man, it's Venom.
Agent Venom: It's okay, Tony, it's me, Flash.
Iron Man: Uh, are you sure you have control of that thing?
Agent Venom: Sure I do. No worries.
JARVIS: Recharge complete, sir.
Symbiote: Powerrrrrrrrrr!
Iron Man: Wait, what??? Hey, stop draining my batteries! We're supposed to be on the same side!
Symbiote: *slurrrrp*
Agent Venom: Uh. Sorry.
Iron Man: Worst. Teammate. Ever.0 -
Muscle #1: Listen buddy, you came prancing around the wrong neighborhood, now you better turn aro-
Star-Lord: *throws a pose* EVERYONE WITH ME!
Muscle #2: Dude? Do you mind? We're trying to threaten you he-
Star-Lord: EVERYONE WITH ME!
Thug: ***** pistol* Someone is getting a bit-
Star-Lord: EVERYONE WITH ME!
Gamora: Uh, good job, I guess? While they're distracted it can be our turn to-
Star-Lord: EVERYONE WITH ME!
Rocket: Are you daft? We are already standing right nex-
Star-Lord: EVERYONE WITH ME!
Everyone: *sigh*
Star-Lord: EVERYONE WITH ME!0 -
We first see dark, threatening clouds, with muted flashes of lightning, heavy with the promise of rain. The camera then pans down, and we see Thor, shrouded in a nimbus of electricity. He is surrounded by men in brown suits, with dark sunglasses, despite the lack of sunlight. Mjolnir whistles through the hair, while bullets ping and zip around him.
Thor: Have at you, recreants!
A bullet nicks him, drawing blood. There is a deep rumble in the air, that becomes louder and louder, but it is not thunder. Then, with an earsplitting roar, a motorcycle comes flying through the air, a girl in white and pink crouched low behind the handlebars, and a hitman falls in its path, as it skids to a halt.
Gwenpool: Hey there, need a hand, big fella? Oh look, a gun.
The two stand out in the open, exchanging fire with the goons.
Agent Venom: You two should seriously take cover. You'll do just as well, and you won't get hit.
Thor and Gwenpool ignore him, while bullets continue to fly through the air.
Agent Venom: Oh man. Fine. TAKE COVER!!!
And as he shouts, he leaps through the air, weapons firing, while Thor and Gwenpool, as if suddenly startled awake, duck behind cover.
Thor: Thou art correct, Flash, 'tis better from back here, though those bullets did but sting a trifle.
Gwenpool: Why don't we ever think of doing this without being told? You should take cover too, Flash.
Flash continues to shoot from the open.
Cue threatening music, bombastic and loud. The camera cuts to a pair of shiny, brown leather shoes, and then pans up past trousers with creases in them that could cut, and then a suit jacket on a body that although strong, has run slightly to fat. Finally a pair of beady eyes, and shining pate.
Muscle: Youse are gonna get it. Scram, or you'll wake up with a horse's head next to you in da middle of the night.
Flash: We're screwed!
The muscle raises his Tommy Gun threateningly.
Thor: Friends, we must flee!!
Gwenpool: But, we're behind cover!
Thor: There is nothing in this multiverse more powerful than this Tommy Gun! Cover will not protect thee!
Gwenpool: This is a really weird game.0 -
Mr. Fantastic: We have little time, friends, Galactus is attacking New York again! I have brought you both here, Spider-Man the undeniable champion of Manhattan and Doc Ock, his constant foe, who matches him in intelligence and prowess. I have established that your equal and opposite powers, when channeled through my superior intellect, will be able to repel this mighty threat.
A lenghty and unbearable bickering about who is entitled to use the term "superior intellect", who is matched with whom and an awkwardly shoehorned quotation of "with great power comes great responsibility" ensues.
Mr. Fantastic: Ugh, anyway, let's do this!
Later, after the trio, battered and bloody, hastily retreated to the Baxter building...
Mr. Fantastic: You both suck! What was I thinking!?
Spider-Man & Doc Ock: Look who's talking!
Ragnarok: *knock knock* Hello? I was told I should be attending a club meeting here today.0 -
Iron Fist: "Luke, do you ever wonder why we make such a good team?"
Luke Cage: "Cause that funky chi you make really makes me wanna punch someone, that's why!"0 -
Beast: I'll produce a potent chemical compound to fortify our strength in battle.
Logan: Thanks bub. If you're so smart why did you just match away your countdown?
Beast: Grrr...0
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